What happens when I try to die each night and feel life asserting itself more vigorously?

Osho, in the third stage of Dynamic Meditation, when a lot of energy is put in, nothing remains there but light. Then fear seizes me: “I’m dead!” O Lord, what should be done in that moment?

In that moment, die. Without dying, it won’t do. In that moment, the very attempt to save yourself will bring you back again. In that moment, lose yourself. In that moment say— This is the final longing in my heart! Light the lamp of my life— let anyone dispel the darkness; but if ever the lamp must be extinguished, let it be by your tender hand. This is the final longing in my heart! If by the hand of the Divine your lamp is extinguished, what greater good fortune could there be! But if ever the lamp must be extinguished, let it be by your tender hand— this is the final longing in my heart! The question is: “Beloved Master, in that moment, what should one do?” Nothing should be done. One should silently slip into the ocean. Like a dewdrop sliding off a blade of grass, falling into the…

Osho, you have said that if a seeker undertakes the experiment with intense resolve—“I want to die, I want to return to my center”—then within a few days his life-energy (prana) begins to contract inward, and the seeker may first, from within, and later from without, see his own body lying there as if dead; then his fear of death is erased forever. So the question is: in such a state, is any special preparation or precaution necessary to be able to return safely to the body again? Or does the return happen all by itself? Please shed light on this.

Human life, in many senses, is the life of the mind. What we take to be a physical event is, in its depths, a mental event as well. Whatever appears upon the body has its birth in the mind. If we understand a couple of points in this regard, then the question that has been asked will be easier to understand. Until about fifty years ago all illnesses were thought to be physical. In these past fifty years, as our understanding of disease has grown, the proportion considered purely physical has gone down and the mental proportion has gone up. Today even the most diehard materialist is ready to accept that more than fifty percent of illnesses are mental. And even those that are physical are influenced more than half by the mind. The mind is the fulcrum of our personality. From there we live, from there we fall ill,…

[A sannyasin, who is leaving, says: Would you say something about dying? I'm very much engaged with that. I awoke last night and suddenly I saw how absolute it was. I've never seen it before like that -- I could hardly get any air. In response to Osho's query she says she likes Kundalini meditation best.] So continue Kundalini in the morning, and in the night before going to sleep, start a death meditation. Just lie down, put the light off, and start feeling that you are dying. Relax the body and feel that you are dying, so you cannot even move the body -- even if you want to move the hand, you cannot. Just go on feeling that you are dying -- a four or five-minute feeling that you are dying, dying, and that the body is dead.

Osho, it seems as if a constant benediction showers from your eyes—sweet and tender. Your eyes move over the listeners, and the moment they fall on me it feels as if a spear has pierced my innermost core. My whole body trembles. Something like death happens. But why does the ultimate death not take place?

The goldsmith puts gold into the fire. If the gold had a little intelligence it would scream and writhe, saying, What are you doing—will you kill me? But how could the gold know that this is the very process of becoming pure? Passing through the fire, whatever remains is kundan, pure gold. What does not die in you even when you die—that is the soul. What is not erased in you even when you are erased—that is your true being. You will have to pass through death. If you go from me having learned anything else, you will have gone collecting trash. If you go having learned death, you have taken the key. We have called India’s supreme mystical scriptures the Upanishads. Upanishad means to be near the master; it means to sit close—just that. What happens by sitting close? By sitting near one who is gone, the courage to…

Beloved Osho, for about six months I have been waking up every morning with a deep fear of death. I must be missing the most important experiences in my meditation to be so afraid of death in my sleep. Years ago, I woke up every morning with a smile and deep happiness that I had found you. Osho, I am still smiling, and the happiness to be with you has deepened even more -- it's just that the mornings are a bit different. Can you please shine some light on them?

And why in the morning only? -- because as meditation deepens your sleep deepens. Your sleep becomes more silent, thoughtless, a tremendous serenity. While you are doing meditation with effort, the very effort does not allow it to go deeper. But once you have tasted something of meditation your sleep automatically moves in the direction of meditation. It is so delicious that when there is nothing to do you are relaxed, your consciousness starts slipping into deeper layers of meditation. In the morning when you wake up a fear arises of death, because meditation is death of the ego. But the death of the ego is the beginning of your authentic life. Once this is understood, slowly, slowly the fear of death will disappear. Secondly, you being a woman... the fear of death is deeper in woman than it is in man. These are the uniquenesses and differences between man…