What is the experience of receiving love during confusing times?

To really live one has to be available to all that is. One has to be open and vulnerable, one has to drop all fears. There is only one thing one should be afraid of, and that is fear. Except for that never be afraid of anything, because fear cripples, kills. And the moment you start moving towards the unknown, in spite of all the fears, your life starts having many new thing, of which you were never aware, because as the adventure deepens, your thrill, your ecstasy, deepens with it. As you start moving into the unknown there are so many challenges to be faced, encountered, that naturally you become more aware, more alert, more cautious, more conscious. You have to be. It is walking on a razor's edges how can you be sloppy? Sloppy? You have to be cautious and alert, it is risky.

[NOTE: This is an unedited tape transcript of an unpublished darshan diary, which has been scanned and cleaned up. It is for reference purposes only.] Love has a very mysterious strength in its mysterious because it contains the fragileness of a flower and also the strength of a rock. It is paradoxical, but that's its beauty. Anything that is not paradoxical remains flat -- consistent, logical, but meaningless. Meaning comes from the tension of the polar opposites. when the contradictories meet and merge and become one, then there is a great explosion; and love is one of the most explosive experiences. It is strong, but not in the sense in which a sword is strong. It is not strong in destroying, it is strong just like the brush of a painter. It is strong in creating; and hence it can contain the fragileness of a flower in it.

That first shock makes you feel like you are dying because that's what you had always known as your life. Your very identity has disappeared as if the earth beneath your feet has suddenly disappeared: you look and there is no earth and you are falling into an abyss. But soon -- and you cannot do anything you have to go on falling, there is nothing to do -- soon you start feeling a great joy instead of fear. The shock disappears, and instead of the fear a great joy arises in you because now for the first time there is space for the joy to happen. It needs space, and thoughts are occupying your inner space so much that it is impossible for bliss to happen. My sannyasins have to do only one thing, that is, they have to become watchers of the mind, not controllers, just watchers.

Question: BELOVED OSHO, SITTING IN MY ROOM THOUSANDS OF KILOMETERS AWAY FROM YOU, I CAN FEEL YOU. AND IF HAD HAVE EYES TO SEE, I WOULD SEE YOU STANDING RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID TO US IN DISCOURSE `IF YOU DON'T FEEL ME WHEN YOU ARE NOT HERE, YOU HAVEN'T LET ME IN.' IT'S SO TRUE -- BUT WHAT A GIFT THAT YOU REALLY, REALLY CAME WHEN I WAS OPEN, THAT YOU REALLY FILLED MY BEING. IN SOME MOMENTS SITTING IN FRONT OF YOU I GOT IT. IN OTHER MOMENTS IT HAPPENED BUT I WASN'T AWARE OF IT AT THAT MOMENT. PUTTING THIS OUT TO YOU MY HEART IS BEATING FASTER AND MY HANDS ARE TREMBLING. FOR THE FIRST TIME I FEEL TO SHOW SOMETHING OF MYSELF. THIS IS A GIFT ALSO.

OSHO: Love is the most intoxicating phenomenon. It is the wine that wells up within. It is not something chemical that comes from the outside, it is not even part of the body, not part of the mind either. It is the dance of the heart in tune with the whole. Love is your heart in deep harmony with the heart of the universe. Then there is great intoxication. And yet the intoxication does not make you unconscious; on the contrary it makes you more conscious than ever. That's the paradox of love: on one hand one is intoxicated, on the other hand one has never been so aware before. It is an intoxication that makes you wake up. HER SIX-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER: PREM GARIMA, GLORY OF LOVE. NENE BECOMES MA PREM KUNDAN OSHO: It is by passing through the fire of love that one becomes one's real self.