What should I do after losing hope in life due to unrequited love?

Osho, I was in love with a young woman. She deceived me and became someone else’s. I am living on, but life has lost all taste. What should I do?

There can’t have been much sap. You are in the illusion that there was. Does sap vanish like that? You don’t even know what sap is. Those who know have said: “Raso vai sah.” They defined God as rasa—essence, sap, joy. They recognized only God as the true savor; nothing else has any lasting savor. Had you gotten the woman, the savor would also have gone—and being tied to her would be another matter. Then it would be hard to get free. Ask the one she has married—what is his condition? Know his griefs too; you’ll find great consolation, great reassurance. A politician once went to visit a madhouse. One man was tearing his hair, beating his chest, holding a woman’s photo, tears streaming—hugging the photo to his chest. He was behind bars. The politician asked the superintendent, “What happened to this man? What is he doing? Whose photo is…

Once I loved a woman but she refused me, and ever since I have been miserable. I have lost all hope in life. What should I do?

You meditate on this story: A visitor to an insane asylum found one of the inmates rocking back and forth in a chair in a contented manner, cooing repeatedly, 'Lulu, Lulu.... ' 'What's the matter with this man?' the visitor asked the attendant. 'Well, you see, sir, Lulu was the woman who jilted him,' the attendant explained. Baffled with the explanation, the visitor proceeded on the tour. Later he came to a padded cell, where an inmate was batting his head repeatedly against the wall and crying, 'Lulu, Lulu...' 'Now why is this man crying "Lulu"?' asked the visitor. 'Oh, he's the fellow Lulu finally married,' the attendant explained. Don't be so miserable. Just find the man whom Lulu has married and all misery will disappear. The last question:

What does one do about unrequited love? What does one do about unrequited love that seems to live on and on like a wound that never heals? How is it that a man can go on loving one woman year after year believing, in spite of the pain, that and day she will find a place for him in her heart? Am I a fool to believe? I think that I am a fool, and yet I continue to believe. Am I creating this situation? Or is this situation creating me?

I said 'You can marry, but once you have married she will not be a widow. Then what will you do? Then the whole charm will disappear because the charm is in her being a widow.' He laughed -- he thought I was joking. And he got married. And after six months he said 'You were right. I'm no more interested in her. My interest was basically in her widowhood. I wanted to show to the public that I am a great servant of people, that I am serving people even through my love. I am sacrificing my love for a widow. I am going against the society, I am going against the tradition. I am doing something great. But now the marriage has happened and the widow has come, now there is no point.' I said 'You do one thing. You commit suicide. She will be a widow again,…

Osho, what if love is not accepted? I’ve never heard anyone say, “Love God—and it isn’t accepted.” So this must be about some other kind of love. You must have loved a woman and it wasn’t accepted. You are blessed. The real difficulty begins when it is accepted. Then you would be saying, “Osho, what if love is accepted?” Then you are in real trouble.

And I am not saying that if you have a wife or husband you should run away. Just understand this: the time has come to lift your eyes upward. You lift your eyes—and let your wife lift hers too. You have both loved each other and tormented each other enough. Now lift your eyes upward. Now both of you love That. And you will be amazed: if both of you become prayerful, if both of you fall in love with God, then between you a stream of love will begin to flow that never flowed before. It is an ancillary flowering of being connected to the Divine. On the wealth whose strength fueled your siege of love, today the bloom of that wealth has grown old. With the garment by which you veiled your edifice’s sores, the hand of mishap turned the garment inside out. In the palaces where you…

Osho, you tell us to love. I too loved; I was defeated, and the wounds have still not healed. Society did not like that love, and my beloved was weak; she bowed before society. I cannot even forgive her. And yet you still tell us to love?

I do not tell you to do love—I tell you to be love. Doing is a small, petty thing. There, only defeat and wounds will come to your hand. And it is good that society put an obstacle in your way; otherwise, as in the story I just told you, by now you would be celebrating your silver jubilee. Society showed you great kindness. Thank society. Take it as grace. And you cannot forgive that woman! What kind of love is this that cannot forgive! What kind of love is this that is full of revenge! And these wounds are not precious wounds. They do not go very deep. They are on the surface—like scratched skin. They are no deeper than the skin. All these heal. Time heals them. Do not sit clutching them. Friend, do not be disheartened! Affairs have often kept forming and breaking. Why those starry tears…