What happens when my sex life becomes quiet?

Beloved master, my sex life has become very quiet lately. Not that I don't want sex and that I am not courageous enough to approach women, but it just doesn't happen. When I approach a woman lots of beautiful energy is flowing, but when it comes to sex, the energy changes. It almost feels as if falling asleep. When I then try to get it going again, the woman feels offended; she doesn't feel connected any more, and feels that I am not accepting her space. What am I doing wrong? Beloved master, can you help me to understand?

And the same problems are going to be faced and encountered by everyone. So when a problem arises, never think twice. Ask it fearlessly, howsoever stupid you look in asking it. Because it is going to help not only you; it is going to help many others who are also struggling in the same situation, but have not been courageous enough to bring it forth. They are trying on their own, somehow, to settle the situation. It is not a question of settling. It is good that it has lost its old, settled state. It is good that it is unsettled, that trouble has arisen. Now it depends on you and on your intelligence, how you use the opportunity -- in favor of your growth, or against it. Asking the question may help you. So two things... first, remember you are fortunate that sex seems to be going away from…

For the first time you will see what sex should be. Ordinarily people are just obsessed by sex. It is not a natural thing. It is almost like a burden... a constant worry about it. It is more like a performance; it is more like a duty that one has to do. If you do it, you don't gain much. If you don't do it, you feel you are losing much; maybe you are missing something. So it is a very vicious circle -- and that's what has been up to now. So before sex becomes normal and natural, there will be a time in which you will lose interest -- in that time don't be afraid. You are not going to become a buddhist nun -- don't be afraid, mm? And by chance you had to listen to Buddha lectures, mm?

Beloved Osho, can it be true that sex is already over? I have been your sannyasin for four and a half years and my body is thirty-one years of age. I never planned to drop sex, but now it feels like it has dropped me. Am I a quicky or what?

Psychology has accepted that body and mind don't grow together. Sometimes, most of the time, the mind is lagging behind and the body goes on growing. A few times, in rare cases, the mind grows ahead and the body lags behind. When Emerson, a great creative and sensitive man, was asked about his age, he said, "Three hundred and sixty years." The people who were present could not believe it; they could not believe that Emerson, a man of truth, a very innocent man, a man loved and respected by all those who could understand the heights of consciousness... why should he lie about such a thing? Three hundred and sixty years old? -- he does not look more than sixty. What to make of it? Finally, one man asked, "Perhaps I could not rightly hear what you said. Will you please repeat it?" Emerson laughed and said, "Why are…

Please describe to us the spiritual significance of sex energy. How can we sublimate and spiritualize sex? Is it possible to have sex, to make love, as a meditation, as a jumping board toward higher levels of consciousness?

There is no such thing as sex energy. Energy is one and the same. Sex is one outlet for it, one direction for it; it is one of the applications of the energy. Life energy is one, but it can manifest in many directions. Sex is one of them. When life energy becomes biological, it becomes sex energy. Sex is just an application of the life energy. So there is no question of sublimation. If life energy flows in another direction, there is no sex. But it is not a sublimation; it is a transformation. Sex is the natural, biological flow of life energy, and the lowest application of it. It is natural because life cannot exist without it, and the lowest because it is the foundation not the peak. When sex becomes the totality, the whole life is just a waste. It is like laying a foundation and going…

Osho, yesterday you said not to throw anger, hatred and the like onto others. But when one goes into meditation and the repressed sexual energy leaps out, doesn’t it require another person for its catharsis? And when this sexual energy erupts like a fierce primordial storm, neither control nor witnessing seems to work—it demands expression. Yet all our moral values are tied to sex. So if the existing husband or wife does not have enough depth for such expression, should the seeker look for a suitable partner? And won’t that create many entanglements?

And semen is not some fixed treasure stored within you, such that if some goes out, the stock diminishes. It is being produced every moment: as the body breathes, eats, exercises, semen is produced. Modern medical research is quite different, even opposite: the more a man uses semen, the longer his virility lasts. The one who, out of fear, stops sexual use early loses semen production early, because when you use semen, the whole body engages again in producing it. When you do not use it, the body need not engage; slowly the capacity to produce declines. This may look paradoxical: those who have more sex can remain capable longer; those who have less, empty out sooner. Thus in the West doctors advise that if intercourse can continue even into seventy, eighty, ninety, the chance of living longer increases—the body remains fresh. Old semen becomes stale and inert; with the…