Self

Why don't I feel that I am myself?

Now the time has come to get out of others' expectations. Don't go on fulfilling others' expectations; that is a very subtle slavery. The mother wants you to do this, the father wants you to do that, the society wants this... and everybody wants, everybody is making demands on you. And nobody leaves you alone and nobody wants you to do the thing that you would like to do. Now the time has come: do your own thing -- get out of all this bondage. This is what sannyas is all about: a declaration of freedom, a declaration that "I am going to be myself whatsoever the cost and whatsoever the consequences." And you will not be a loser, that I can promise you; you will not be a loser, you will be infinitely enriched. You are not here to fulfill others' expectations, you are here to live your authentic…

You always.say that you're not there. Everyone else says they look into your eyes and there's no one there. How is it that I always experience the opposite, that you're there and you're the only one who's really there?

Savita, truth is always paradoxical. If it is not paradoxical it is not truth. The only way to be is not to be. Only when one is absent, presence arrives. So, both are true. Those who look into my eyes and see nobody they are right, absolutely right. And, Savita, you are also right: that when you look into my eyes you see THE ONLY ONE WHO'S REALLY THERE. And these two experiences don't contradict, they com-plement each other. If somebody is looking for an ego in me, for a personality, he will not find one. There is no personality there; the personality has disappeared. It was a dream, and I no more entertain any dreams. It was a guest; now the only one who lives inside me is the host. Those who are looking for the guest, they will not find the guest -- they will not see any…

Beloved Osho, what does it mean when you say, "just be yourself"? How can I be myself when I don't know who I am? I know many of my preferences, likings, dislikings and tendencies, which seem to be the outcome of a programmed biocomputer called the mind. Does just being oneself mean that one totally lives out the whole content of the mind as watchfully as possible?

Yes, it exactly means that -- to live as an awareness: awareness of all the programs the mind has been conditioned for, awareness of all the impulses, desires, memories, imaginations... all that the mind can do. One has to be not part of it, but separate -- seeing it but not being it -- watching it. And this is one of the most essential things to remember, that you cannot watch your watchfulness. If you watch your watchfulness, then the watcher is you, not the watched. So you cannot go beyond watchfulness. The point that you cannot transcend is your being. The point that you cannot go beyond is you. You can watch very easily any thought, any emotion, any sentiment. Just one thing you cannot watch -- and that is your watchfulness. And if you manage to watch it, that means you have shifted: the first watchfulness has become…

Question: BELOVED OSHO, CAN YOU SAY WHO YOU ARE? Maneesha, I am an invitation for all those who are seeking, searching, and have a deep longing in their hearts to find their home. I am an answer to the question that everybody is, but cannot formulate -- a question that is more a quest than a question, more a thirst than a verbal, mental inquiry; a thirst that one feels in every cell and fiber of his being, but has no way to bring to words and ask. I am an answer for that question which you cannot ask and you cannot expect that it could be answered. When I say I am the answer, I don't mean that I can give you the answer... yes, if you are ready, you can take it.