Does inhibition reinforce the ego?

Osho, does inhibition reinforce the ego? I feel like doing certain things, seeing certain things. Even when I long to fall at someone’s feet, I hold back from touching their feet out of embarrassment. In my hesitation I think, “What will people say?”

Ramchhabi Prasad! Inhibition not only reinforces the ego, it is the ego’s hidden form—a face concealed behind a veil. Inhibition is the ego’s image, only veiled. From the outside you don’t see the ego within. Inhibition is ego wrapped in polite coverings, draped in cultured garments. But probe a little, scratch a little, and you’ll find the ego inside. The egoless person is without inhibition. The egoless person is exactly as he is. If he feels like touching someone’s feet, he touches them; if he doesn’t, he doesn’t. He lives simply, spontaneously. Nothing in his life is superimposed from above. The egoist is busy every moment calculating: What will serve my ego more? Should I stand stiff? Will not bowing before anyone help? Should I make my face into a stone idol so people say, “Look, the Iron Man!” An egoist can also think, “Here, touching feet might be useful—people…

Beloved Osho, I feel that through developing an attitude of endurance towards difficulties, I have become resigned to much of life. This resignation feels like a weight pushing against my effort to become more alive in meditation. Does this mean that I have suppressed my ego, and that I must find it again before I can really lose it?

If you are simply ignorant because you never attained to any knowledge, your ignorance cannot be wise, it cannot be wisdom -- it is simply absence of knowledge. And the hankering will be inside: How to gain more knowledge? How to gain more information? When you know too much -- you have known the scriptures, you have known the past, the tradition, you have known all that can be known -- then suddenly you become aware of the futility of it all, suddenly you become aware that this is not knowledge. This is borrowed! This is not your own existential experience, this is not what you have come to know. Others may have known it, you have simply gathered it. Your gathering is mechanical. It has not arisen out of you, it is not a growth. It is just rubbish gathered from other doors, borrowed, dead. Remember, knowing is alive…

Osho, what is the fundamental anguish of human life?

There is only one anguish: that a human being cannot become what he was born to be. There is only one anguish: that the seed remains a seed and does not bloom like a flower; that it cannot scatter its fragrance to the infinite winds; cannot converse with the moon and stars; cannot offer its colors to the sky; cannot be expressed. If the poem within the poet cannot be revealed—anguish. If the painter cannot paint—anguish. If the dancer cannot dance—if chains lie on his feet—anguish. Anguish means only this: that what we are meant to be—our innate nature and destiny—does not come to fruition, and we are forced to be something else. Then anguish is born. Then melancholy gathers over life. And all those countless people you see burdened with sorrow, living in a kind of hell—the reason is only this: each has come carrying the seed of becoming…

Osho, whenever someone tells you that such-and-such is happening in meditation and you say, “Good, that is auspicious,” the ego grows even more. And at all other times the ego keeps raising its head. Even while writing this question the ego thought a lot about it, and still...?

And I tell you: only the shadow remains with you; you have lost the soul. Imagine what your plight must be! Losing a shadow caused such trouble; you have lost the soul and kept only the shadow. But perhaps you don’t notice much trouble because those among whom you live have also lost their souls. The truth is, if you gain your soul, the trouble begins—those without souls become your enemies. Otherwise, why would people stone Mahavira, insult Buddha, crucify Mansoor, poison Socrates, kill Jesus? The crowd is without soul. Whenever a soul-full person stands among them, they become very uneasy. What foolishness! They should learn from the soulful how to become soulful. But seeing a soulful person, they get anxious. They say, “His presence proves we failed to become what we should have become. We lost.” Anxiety arises: “Our life is wasted. Remove this man; his presence is a…

Osho, may the color of that flower fade so that only the fragrance remains; let the head go if it must, but let honor remain. Let Your glory be proven by my negation. May I efface myself so completely that only You remain.

No need to rush. Don’t even start trying to erase the “I.” The “I” is such a clever craftsman that if you set out to erase it, it will hide behind the eraser. One day the ego will rise and proclaim, Look, I have destroyed my ego! Now I am egoless! Who is as humble as I? Such a declaration is the ego’s own. Awaken within. Watch and recognize the routes of ego. There is no need to fight. Fight only if you wish to lose—if you want to be defeated. Then how does ego go? Ego dissolves through awareness alone—just as darkness disappears when a light is lit. You don’t have to shove darkness out! You don’t have to slash it with a sword! You don’t wrestle with darkness. If someone starts wrestling with darkness, thumping his chest, do you think he will ever win? He will die fighting,…