How can we differentiate between surrender and dependency in our lives?

How can we know the difference between surrender and dependency, not just with you but with all that comes up in our lives?

Or, loving your woman, melt into her warmth. For a moment forget sexuality, for a moment forget all that goes on in your head, in your fantasy. For a moment just melt into the real woman. Don't carry any pornography in your head, don't make sexuality something cerebral. Let your sexuality be a deep sensuousness, sensitivity, a gut feeling. Melt into the woman, as if you are again a child in the mother's womb. Unless you have known this with your beloved, you have not known your beloved. A child again in the mother's womb, absolutely together, all distances gone -- and in that moment you will know what surrender is. But the male ego creates trouble everywhere. Even being with your woman, you are trying to control the situation. Even in our language, ugly expressions have entered: we call it lovemaking. How can you make love? Nobody can make…

What is the difference between waiting for godot and waiting for god?

It is as if the sun has risen in the morning and you are sitting in your room with closed doors and windows, in darkness. Open the doors, you become available to the sun. The sun was already available -- just the meeting happens. You cannot wait for God. All waiting is for Godot. Godot means the one who never comes, who CANNOT come, whose arrival is impossible. And the only impossible thing is that which has already happened -- how can it happen again? You are alive, and you are waiting for life, Now, this is ridiculous. The real man of religion does not think in terms of God. He thinks in terms of life or, even better, of living -- because life can again become an abstract idea. Living, moment-to-moment living. In that very living, one knows what God is, because one knows who one is. Your idea…

Beloved Osho, to be disobedient and to surrender seem to me polar opposites. Please explain how the two can be lived.

They are not polar opposites. Just a little awareness.... Be disobedient to your ego -- that is the meaning of surrender. If you want to be disobedient to the person you are surrendering to, then they are opposite, polar opposites. Then why surrender? Surrender simply means you trust the person more than your ego, you trust the person more than your own mind. Surrender happens only in a situation where you have found someone whom you can trust more than you can trust yourself. Then disobey your ego. But people never think in that way. They never think of disobeying their ego, they are always disobeying others. And they don't understand that disobeying others may be just obeying their own ego. This is what has happened with J. Krishnamurti. For his whole life he has been a teacher of thousands of people, telling them to disobey, to be rebellious, not…

Osho, please talk about surrender and obedience.

And because from the very beginning your father, your mother, your parents, your teachers, your priests are all teaching you, "Do this, don't do that," they all create a certain obedience in you. You become addicted to obedience; it is a drug. So when you come to me you would like.... People go on asking me -- I never answer their questions -- they go on asking me, "Give us detailed instructions what we should do and what we should not. We want clear instructions from you." I give you clarity not clear instructions, because my instructions may be right today and tomorrow they may not be right. My instructions may be a hindrance to your growth tomorrow because nobody knows about tomorrow -- it is unpredictable. So I give you clarity so that you can find your own way of life today and tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.…

What is the meaning of surrender? How is surrender?

Coming closer to me, you will be able to imbibe my spirit. That is the meaning of surrender: that you are ready to come close to me, that you are not afraid, that you will not protect yourself against me, that you will not be defensive, that simply you are ready to come closer to me, that you are attracted, that you have heard my call, that something has clicked in your heart and you will try to know who this man really is, what manner of man. You would like to enter into my emptiness and be surrounded by my emptiness. Sannyas is the visible effort of surrender. Many people come to me and they say, "We don't take sannyas. Can't you help us?" I say, "I will try my best, but it won't be of much help because you will continuously protect yourself. You will be defensive." Sannyas…