How to surrender to intermediaries at the ashram?

In surrendering to you, am I surrendering to myself?

Nirvesh, in asking it you have lost the way. Just a few days before, Nirvesh was there in darshan, and was saying to me 'Now it is enough. Enough is enough. For one year I have been wandering. Now I surrender everything to you. Now take possession of me and lead me wherever you want.' Now, this question: IN SURRENDERING TO YOU, AM I SURRENDERING TO MYSELF? Yes, if you really surrender to me, you have surrendered to your real self, because I am one with the real self of all. That is the meaning of God. I am no more separate from the whole, I am where you also should be. I am just a reflection of your innermost core; you cannot see within it yourself because you are not yet able to go into those deeper realms of your being, but you can see it in me. The…

Osho, wherever there is a feeling of surrender—whether to God or to a master—there must be some concept about the one we surrender to. Then that surrender is also only to a concept, isn’t it? Or is surrender something different? Please explain.

Surrender does not arise from your concept. Where all your concepts fall away, there is surrender. Before the one in whose presence you lay down all your notions. You say, “I have looked through many concepts and found nothing but blindness. Through the lenses of my beliefs I have looked and looked, and nowhere did I see the divine. Now I place all concepts at your feet. Now let me be without concepts. Now, empty, I look at you.” This is the meaning of surrender. To sit by someone in emptiness is surrender. Become empty, and you have surrendered. Surrender is not a declaration to be made with band and drum. Surrender is the tone of zero—shunya. It happens in silence. There is no need to make noise, to stake a claim, to summon witnesses. Wherever you go and sit down empty, there surrender happens. And then what to say…

Osho, please talk about surrender and obedience.

And because from the very beginning your father, your mother, your parents, your teachers, your priests are all teaching you, "Do this, don't do that," they all create a certain obedience in you. You become addicted to obedience; it is a drug. So when you come to me you would like.... People go on asking me -- I never answer their questions -- they go on asking me, "Give us detailed instructions what we should do and what we should not. We want clear instructions from you." I give you clarity not clear instructions, because my instructions may be right today and tomorrow they may not be right. My instructions may be a hindrance to your growth tomorrow because nobody knows about tomorrow -- it is unpredictable. So I give you clarity so that you can find your own way of life today and tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.…

Question: First question: Osho, how can the state of surrender be attained? In life, the most difficult, the most arduous inner state is surrender. The mind is built around the ego. It is easy for the mind to assume, “I am the center of the whole universe,” as if the earth, the sun, the stars all revolve around me, for me; the whole of life is a means, and I am the end. The ego-state means: I am the goal and everything else is a means. Everything exists for me; I exist for no one. I am the target; all that happens is for me. All is an arrangement to serve me. This is the ego-mood. Surrender is exactly the opposite: I am nothing. My being is like a void, and the center lies outside me.

Beloved Osho, the other night during discourse I realized that I am so stubborn and pigheaded. I always have this "but" inside me and I don't know how to jump over it. Osho, how can I surrender to you totally?

Vimal Kavisha, your question is tremendously interesting. You say, "The other night during discourse I realized that I am so stubborn and pigheaded." The moment anybody realizes that he is pigheaded, he is no more. And no pig can ever realize that he is pigheaded; that's an impossibility. If you have realized that you are pigheaded, one thing is absolutely certain: you are not a pig. And you have also realized that you are so stubborn. I would like humbly to say to you that you are not, because a really stubborn person will jump any "but," howsoever big it is. It will become a challenge to his stubbornness. You are asking, "I always have this `but' inside me and I don't know how to jump over it." Just be pigheaded and stubborn and jump! Moreover, I have never asked you to drop your buts and ifs. You cannot --…