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Osho on Family

Family

Family, shaped by the unconscious forces of our past and karmic ties, envelops us like a womb, yet it is through the awakening of conscious love that we learn to transcend this predestined embrace, ultimately empowering us to choose the bonds we wish to nurture.

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Osho's perspective on Family

When Osho Spoke About Family

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The Transmission Of The Lamp · Discourse 35Question 1 1986-06-12 Punta Del Este, Uruguay. English

Beloved Osho, in india there is a proverb, "vasudhaiva kutumbakam: the whole earth is a family". Perhaps this proverb is one thousand years old. Osho, were there really people once who lived like a family? Or was it a vision of some mystic, a vision which you are going to bring to reality?

They have not bothered about Jesus' teachings. He was saying, "Love your enemy like yourself." Then I cannot understand who these people were killing. If you are going to love your enemy, are you going to kill your lovers? Enemies have to be loved, so who is to be killed -- friends? No, the teaching has not been followed; only sermons were given in the churches. But enemies -- and innocent enemies, who have done no harm to the Christians.... Their only crime was that they were not Christians, and they were not willing to be Christians; and that was too much, too big a crime. Hindus used a more sophisticated method, perhaps because it was an older civilization, more cultured. They could have crucified Gautam Buddha, but they did not do that. On the contrary, they accepted Gautam Buddha as one of the incarnations of the Hindu God. You…

Yesterday you talked about destroying the family. Did you ever have a family?

Everybody is born in a family. I was born in a family. And in India there are joint families, big families. In my family there must have been fifty to sixty people -- all the cousins, uncles, aunts, living together. I have seen the whole mess of it. In fact, those sixty people helped me not to create my own family. That experience was enough. If you are intelligent enough, you learn even from other people's mistakes. If you are not intelligent, then you don't learn even from your own mistakes. So I learned from my father's mistake, my mother's mistake, my uncles', my aunts'. It was a big family, and I saw the whole circus, the misery, the continuous conflict, fights about small things, meaningless. From my very childhood one thing became decisive in me, that I was not going to create a family of my own. I was…

Osho, as you have just said, life is multidimensional. What do you think should be our attitude toward the... Whether we know that what our parents... and what should be our attitude toward our family? Toward our...

There are two or three points in this. First, this is not a “should” question. The moment we say, “What should my attitude be toward mother and father?” the whole thing goes wrong. In fact, if the mother is a mother, a certain attitude is already implied; if the father is a father, a certain attitude is already implied. Their very being mother and father has already defined a way of relating. There is no room for “should” in it. No one asks me, “What should my attitude be toward my beloved?” No one asks this; so far, no one has. The reason is: with a beloved the attitude is already there. But we ask about the mother because there is no real attitude; about the father, because there is none. So we look for some formal imposition. It becomes a question. This question never arises about a beloved; it…
The Path Of The Mystic · Discourse 8Question 2 1986-05-08 Punta Del Este, Uruguay English

Beloved Osho, in a few days I am going to visit my eighty-year-old father whom I have not seen for seven years. He is very insistent about seeing me but at the same time very unhappy that I am a sannyasin. How to make him feel good and still not feel like a hypocrite?

You are not going... that's the only way! In the first place to go to Europe in such conditions of nuclear radiation is dangerous; there is no point. Secondly, to make him unhappy while he is dying at the age of eighty is not good. If you go as a sannyasin he will be more unhappy than if you don't go. For seven years you have not gone. If you go as a non-sannyasin you will feel unhappy that you are being a hypocrite, and there is every possibility that it will be discovered that you are simply pretending to be a non-sannyasin. So why harass the old man? And it is not certain that he is going to die. As far as I know the longer a person lives the less is the possibility of death. Have you ever heard of anybody dying at one hundred twenty, one hundred…

"The vision of humanity as one family is not a distant dream but a potential within each of us, waiting to be awakened through our own inner transformation."

It’s never happened yet; we make saints special instead of changing ourselves, but if we stop worshiping and grow inside, treating everyone like family can become real.
AI Confidence Score: 96% Read Original Discourse →

"Learn from the mistakes of others; do not inherit their misery."

He grew up in a big family, saw lots of fights, and decided not to get married or start his own family.
AI Confidence Score: 95% Read Original Discourse →

"Your authenticity and joy are the greatest gifts you can offer; let love, humor, and patience dissolve the clouds of misunderstanding."

Be honest about being a sannyasin, stay loving and playful if he’s upset, and show your happiness—maybe teach him to watch his breath.
AI Confidence Score: 95% Read Original Discourse →

"Your first responsibility is to your own being; real love gives freedom, not obedience. By living your truth, you help both yourself and your parents grow beyond their unfulfilled ambitions."

Care about your parents, but choose your own path and don’t try to please them by betraying yourself.
AI Confidence Score: 70% Read Original Discourse →

"Your parents' agnosticism may have left a void, but within that emptiness lies the opportunity for your own courageous, meditative seeking; turn inward to discover the silent, beautiful center beyond belief, and watch despair dissolve."

If your parents only said “no” to religion without looking within, they handed you an empty hole—fill it by calmly looking inside yourself.
AI Confidence Score: 62% Read Original Discourse →

"True freedom lies not in obedience or rebellion, but in the awakening of your own intelligence and love to make choices that resonate with your being."

He won’t tell you to break or keep your family; he wants you to use your own loving intelligence to decide.
AI Confidence Score: 36% Read Original Discourse →

"Love arises naturally in the living bond of family; when it fades, embrace the truth and let go of expectations, for clarity is the path to freedom."

Don’t follow a rulebook with family—either let real love guide you, or if it’s gone, be honest, do your duty, and stop pretending.
AI Confidence Score: 90% Read Original Discourse →

"You do not choose your family; your unawareness and karma guide you into the womb that fits your past. Only through conscious love and awareness can you prepare to die in such a way that you reclaim the power to choose."

You didn’t pick your family; your unconscious state pulled you to parents like you, and by becoming aware now you can gain choice in the future.
AI Confidence Score: 97% Read Original Discourse →

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