According to Osho, harmony arises by seeing so-called opposites as one rhythm: hate and anger come and go, while love and compassion endure and even grow by absorbing them. The issue isn’t hate but unlived love. Love fully, allow distance when it appears, then return; like hunger and satiety, day and night. Embrace the cycle consciously - 'divorce and remarry' - and each pole renews and strengthens the other.
Opposites are part of one dance—let the ‘going away’ moments happen, then come back to love and kindness stronger.
From the Discourses
Passages where Osho speaks to this question — each links to the complete discourse.
You talked about the harmony of the opposites. I feel that hate kills love and anger kills compassion. The extremes are fighting inside me. How can I find the harmony?
Buddha is compassionate. He is a warrior. He comes from the kshatriya race, a samurai. He must have led a very angry life -- and then suddenly, compassion. Mahavir comes from a kshatriya clan. In fact, this looks absurd but it has a certain consistency to it: all the great teachers of non-violence have come from the kshatriya race. No Brahmin has preached nonviolence. We know of only one Brahmin, who is known as one of the avataras, Parusharam. He was the most violent man the world has ever known -- a Brahmin, the most violent! The twenty-four teerthankaras of the Jains are all kshatriyas, Buddha is a kshatriya. They talk about non-violence, compassion; they have lived violence, they know what violence is, they have passed through it. Even if a Brahmin tries to be nonviolent, his non-violence cannot be more than skin deep. Only a kshatriya, a warrior, who…
The hidden harmony is better than the obvious.
OPPOSITION BRINGS CONCORD. OUT OF DISCORD COMES THE FAIREST HARMONY. IT IS IN CHANGING THAT THINGS FIND REPOSE. PEOPLE DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW THAT WHICH IS AT VARIANCE WITH ITSELF, AGREES WITH ITSELF. THERE IS A HARMONY IN THE BENDING BACK, AS IN THE CASE OF THE BOW AND LYRE. THE NAME OF THE BOW IS LIFE, BUT ITS WORK IS DEATH. I was reading a pamphlet. They say, "Kill man! Murder every man! -- because if man lives, there can be no freedom for woman." But if you kill man, can you be there? The game needs both. Lilith disappeared, then the game could not continue, so God had to create a woman. That's why he tried one bone of man himself this time, because to bring a separate woman would again create trouble. So he took a rib out of Adam and created a woman. Hence, there is…
I feel a lot of hate inside me. What can I do about it?
This duality is a natural thing. If you love, then you have to hate. There are people who go on preaching: "Love the whole world!" But you cannot love the world unless you discover another world to hate. I don't think this planet Earth can become one until we discover enemies on some other planet. The moment we discover an enemy somewhere -- and we are trying very hard to find one -- then the whole world can become one. When India is fighting Pakistan, there is no fighting within India; India becomes one. There is a very deep patriotic feeling for India because now that love balances the hatred toward Pakistan. But when there is no war, then Hindus fight Mohammedans, and Brahmins fight Sudras, one state fights another state, one party fights another party... and the thing goes on. But if there is an enemy somewhere, then the…
I have just recently been helped to discover that nobody is perfect and to let go of my fantasy of a perfect person. Now I am left with my feelings of loving and hating the same person and I find it difficult to live with such intense, seemingly polar opposites in myself. Anything to do?
It is said about Nero that he was so much obsessed with food that he had four doctors following him wherever he would go. And those four doctors' duty was to make him vomit. He would eat too much and the doctors would make him vomit, and then he would eat too much again -- immediately. To make it possible for him, so he could eat many times in a day, the only way was to help him vomit. Now this is madness. And how can you enjoy food when you are continuously vomiting? It is nauseating, the very idea is nauseating. And when you digest it you will throw your whole system into a chaos. It is the mind being destructive to the body. When you eat, enjoy it totally. But then there is a need for six to eight hours' fast -- only then does the hunger arise…
Why sometimes, with sensitivity, does a negative mood develop in me?
Negative and positive moods will both develop. If you want to be very, very happy, side by side the capacity to be very, very unhappy will develop. If you want that the negative should not develop, then you have to cut the positive also. This is what has happened. You have been taught not to be angry, but if you are not capable of being angry, compassion will suffer. Then you will not be able to be compassionate. You have been taught not to hate, but love will suffer, you will not be able to love -- and this is the dilemma. Love and hate grow together. In fact, they are not two things. Language gives you the wrong impression. We should not use the words 'love' and 'hate', we should use lovehate; it is one word. There should not even be a hyphen between them -- lovehate -- not…