According to Osho, disillusionment happens because you project your ideas onto him; since he is ‘empty’—without ego—he becomes a screen for your fantasies. He will lovingly shatter those projections, which hurts. If you cultivate meditative, nonprojective awareness and drop all labels and expectations, you see reality-as-it-is—his nothingness—and then disillusionment ends.
You’ll feel let down if you imagine things about him; stop imagining and, through calm seeing (meditation), look at what is.
From the Discourses
Passages where Osho speaks to this question — each links to the complete discourse.
My parents deceived me with father christmas. Are you real, or will I be disillusioned again?
The question is from Anand Nitya. Why she has asked has to be understood. Since she has been here in this ashram, she has not been able to become part of the family. She has been resisting in many ways. I tolerate these things for a time, but I cannot tolerate them forever; otherwise I will not be able to help you at all. A day is bound to come when I will start hammering. The day I start hammering, you start feeling negative, you start feeling against me. If I go according to you, then everything is beautiful, then Osho is beautiful. The moment I start going in some other direction when it is not easy for you to go with me, then negativity arises. And I have to go against all of you! Because I love you. I have to go against all of you; otherwise I will…
I have heard that the person whom one loves does not really exist but is a projection focussed through the lens of the mind onto whatever screen it has with the least distortion. Can you elaborate?
The question is from Neeravo. There is no need to elaborate. You heard absolutely rightly. That's how it is. It is a simple fact. We go on projecting, we go on seeing things which we want to see. We never allow reality to be as it is. We never allow that which is to be mirrored in us. We go on carrying thoughts, desires, ideas, and we project them. And in love that happens more because in love you are almost on a psychedelic trip. Love is psychedelic; some kind of inner LSD is released, some hormones are released, some chemical things change inside you. You are affected by those chemical changes and you start seeing things. You become a visionary, a dreamer. And the person you fall in love with may not have anything to do with it. He may be just a screen. But then you are bound…
Osho, how can one differentiate between a projected experience and an authentic feeling?
The old woman said, "I have served him for thirty years, but still I feel that his purity is a maintained purity. It is not yet effortless. So before dying I want to know whether I was serving a right man or whether I was just deluded as he is deluded -- because I have been a part in this. So just before my death, let me know it. I want to know." So the prostitute went. It was midnight and the monk was meditating -- the last meditation of the night. The moment he saw that the prostitute was coming... he knew her, and he knew well. She belonged to the same village. And he knew well, moreover, because he had been attracted to her so many times before. Really, he was fighting against this prostitute for years. He was bewildered. He just ran out of the hut and…
Osho, even after the illusion has broken hundreds of times, trust does not return. What should I do? How will trust come back?
That the illusion has broken hundreds of times—this very impression seems illusory. In truth it has not broken. You must have assumed it broke without it actually breaking. The illusion did not break; you were in a hurry. Something else broke and you thought the illusion broke. Understand: you fell in love with a woman and found sorrow. You think the illusion is broken? That is mistaken. The relationship with this woman broke; the illusion did not—because the illusion has nothing to do with this particular woman. Now your mind is seeking another woman. The illusion continues. You made a relationship with another woman, again you found sorrow—you think the illusion is broken? You are mistaken; the illusion has not broken. The mind is now looking for a third woman. The mind keeps saying that until the right woman is found, keep searching. On this vast earth, surely somewhere there…
Osho, is it only disappointment that one finds in the world? Is it utterly futile to keep hope?
A little boy asks his old granny, “Granny, can you croak?” She says, “Yes, son, why not?” The boy says, “Then croak, please! Because mom was saying: ‘When that old woman croaks we’ll get lots of money.’” But the child can be forgiven; he understood as much as he could. He thinks it’s only a matter of saying “croak”—say it and we’ll get money. He doesn’t know what lies behind death. But even grown-ups behave the same way. Neither do you understand what is said to you, nor do you understand what you see. As long as mind is there, you deform everything. Only free of mind does truth begin to appear. Then this world is wondrous. Then it is not maya. Your mind has made it appear as maya. Your mind has cast the net of illusion upon it. Bhartrihari left palace and home for the forest to meditate.…