People pretend because it keeps them safe and liked in a world that often punishes honesty, and we learn this early as kids.
From the Discourses
Passages where Osho speaks to this question — each links to the complete discourse.
Why are people so fake?
People are so fake because it pays, it is a good policy. If you are true, you will be in danger. You can be true only in a true society where truth is respected, loved. This society exists through lies. Here truth is not respected, here truth is crucified, here truth is killed. Lies are enthroned. That's why politics becomes so important in this world -- because politics is the game of lies. And the politicians become the most important people in the world. They should be the last. They become the first because this world -- this whole society -- is based on lies. And if you live with liars and you will live with this falsehood all around you, you have to be fake. It pays, it is economical, it is safe. It protects you -- otherwise people will be against you. If you are true and they…
Osho, I feel I can lovingly understand you, and I can even make others understand. Then why does that very understanding fail to bring authenticity into life—whose absence keeps a constant disintegration going inside and out? Where is the mistake being made? Kindly shed your light.
But how does authenticity arise? If you tie it to “how,” you will be stuck—because authenticity is not something you can produce. Whatever you produce will be inauthentic. Keep this well in your heart: whatever you manufacture will be false. How can what you put on be authentic? The authentic has already been created by the divine. You ask, “How do I wear my original face?” The original face is not worn; it is. Only masks are worn. Anything you can put on will be false. Don’t say, “Fine, I won’t wear the false; I will wear the true.” Can the true be worn? The true is that which is on you without your putting it on—which even if you tried, you could not remove. That which you never miss, never lose, from which you are never separate—that is authentic. So what to do? Only see the false as false.…
Beloved Osho, why does everyone want to pretend to be what they are not? What is the psychology behind it?
You are being taught everything, but you are not being taught to be yourself. This is the ugliest form of society possible, because it makes everybody miserable. I have heard of another great man, a great professor of literature who was being retired from the university. All the university professors had gathered, all his friends had gathered, and they were rejoicing. But suddenly they became aware that he was missing. One of his friends, an attorney, went out... perhaps he in was the garden. But what was he doing there? He was sitting under a tree. The attorney was his closest friend, a boyhood friend. The attorney said, "What are you doing here?" He said, "What I am doing here? Remember fifty years ago? -- I came to tell you that I wanted to kill my wife. And you said, `Don't do any such thing. Otherwise -- fifty years in…
How can I be authentic? How can I speak and act the truth when the society and the world on which I have to depend for my worldly needs are based upon lies and untruth
Then be untrue. Then don't create any misery for yourself. But the life for which you are going to be untrue will be taken away from you sooner or later. Death is certain. So if you want to live in an untrue society, comfortably -- then live comfortably. But that comfort is not leading you anywhere except death. Whatsoever you call a comfortable and convenient life, I call only a comfortable way to die. It is slow suicide. But the choice is yours. I am not forcing any goal, any structure on you. I am simply stating bare facts: that if you want to be comfortably, conveniently dying, compromise with the lies that surround you. But you will never feel comfortable deep down. An unease will remain inside your heart. And I know well that if you become authentic and true, it is going to be arduous. Otherwise, why should…
You said last night that modern man has become inauthentic in expressing anger, violence, sex, etc. You say that in india students and the younger generation are less violent in their emotional expressions than are western youth does this mean that western youth are becoming more authentic in their expressions? Is permissiveness in the expression of sex and anger a growth toward being authentic in emotional expressions?
Remember, whenever you lie, deceive, are dishonest, you are forced to do that. That is not your choice, not a real choice. Why do you lie? Because of the consequences, because of the society: you will suffer if you say the truth. You lie and you escape suffering. Really, the society has forced you to lie; it was not your choice. If you say the truth, it is your choice, no one is forcing you to say the truth. Everything is forcing you to say a lie, to be dishonest. That is more convenient, safe, secure. Now you are entering danger, insecurity, but this is your choice. With this choice, for the first time you attain a self. So animal authenticity is one thing, and man's authenticity is qualitatively different -- it is a conscious choice. So a buddha is one again. He is like an animal, with only one…