What happens when I am unable to truly understand or assimilate teachings?

Osho, it seems that till now I have not been able to truly hear you or understand you, nor have I been able to assimilate even a single one of your teachings. Even what you said to me in our first meeting years ago has taken all this time to be understood. Why is it so? Why am I so dull-witted? Anand Maitreya has asked.

It is because you are not dull-witted. The dull-witted, merely on hearing, think they have heard. The dull-witted, merely on hearing, think they have understood. The dull-witted seize upon the word and imagine they have attained the truth. The dull-witted become pundits, become learned just by listening. They gather the trash and litter of words and think, “It’s all done.” No—it is because you are not dull-witted. You remember the Mahabharata story, don’t you? Dronacharya was giving lessons to his students. All the students memorized the lesson; only Yudhishthira did not. He said, “I haven’t remembered it yet.” One day he was excused, the next day too, and then Drona began to worry; things were going upside down. Drona had thought Yudhishthira the most intelligent. Even the others—Duryodhana memorized it, Bhima memorized it—those in whom there was no sign of intelligence at all, who really ought to be dull-witted—otherwise how…

Question: Second question: Osho, I don’t understand what you say. What should I do? Both are unwise. Both were in a hurry. There’s no hurry to be for or against. Patience is needed. The art of listening comes only to the patient. Listen in stillness, in silence. Listen just to listen—“for now, let me simply hear.” Listen as you would to the roar of the ocean, the rumble of thunder. At such a time you don’t think, Is it right or wrong? Does it conform to the Vedas? Are the verses of the Quran for or against this mountain stream? You must have heard the story. Three pundits finished their studies in Kashi and set out for home. They halted in a forest at night. In the morning, hungry, they decided to cook. One was a botanist. “You go buy the vegetables; who better than you to choose?

Osho, you say the same thing in countless ways. But when I listen to you, it feels as if I am hearing it for the first time. And I feel so much joy that I don’t feel like going back home. What should I do—what can I do—so that I can just keep listening to you!

You will feel as if you have been made to rise out of season, before time—as if you were not yet to go and yet had to go. And if you go in that way, your home will become even more desolate than before. I do not want to make your home desolate; I want to make your home a temple. I want that when you go home, your home’s new form is revealed. I do not want to tear you away from home, from the world, from family life. That is the newness of my sannyas: I do not want to sever you from the world; I want to join you to the world in such a way that your connection with the world becomes a connection with the Divine. Let the world no longer be a barrier between you and the Divine; let it become a means. If…

Osho, I feel I can lovingly understand you, and I can even make others understand. Then why does that very understanding fail to bring authenticity into life—whose absence keeps a constant disintegration going inside and out? Where is the mistake being made? Kindly shed your light.

But how does authenticity arise? If you tie it to “how,” you will be stuck—because authenticity is not something you can produce. Whatever you produce will be inauthentic. Keep this well in your heart: whatever you manufacture will be false. How can what you put on be authentic? The authentic has already been created by the divine. You ask, “How do I wear my original face?” The original face is not worn; it is. Only masks are worn. Anything you can put on will be false. Don’t say, “Fine, I won’t wear the false; I will wear the true.” Can the true be worn? The true is that which is on you without your putting it on—which even if you tried, you could not remove. That which you never miss, never lose, from which you are never separate—that is authentic. So what to do? Only see the false as false.…

Lao tzu says: my teachings are very easy to understand and very easy to practise, but no one can understand them and no one can practise them. In my words there is a principle. In the affairs of men there is a system. Because they know not these, they also know me not. Since there are few that know me, therefore I am distinguished. Therefore the sage wears a coarse cloth on top and carries jade within his bosom.

Have you watched children? Have you told them stories? You tell them a story and the next day they are again asking: Tell us the same one again. You feel bored, but they are asking for the same story again. If you tell it to them, and if they are not feeling sleepy, they say: Once more! Tell us the story again! Because the number of times you tell it does not make much difference. They don't become knowledgeable. They don't gather dust. They remain clean, their mirror remains fresh. Again, some day it can happen that you are sitting with a man who is very boring. You are perfectly bored; then you.turn on the music and that same symphony starts filling the room. You have heard it many times but suddenly now again it is enchanting. It has a magic. What has happened? That boring man was creating so…