What happens if I wait before taking the jump into sannyas?

Osho, cannot I wait a little before taking the jump into sannyas? I don't feel fully ready yet.

The great mathematician was getting old and his health was deteriorating every day. He went to his physician. After a complete check the doctor took a deep breath and began. "Dear sir, in a case like this it is better to be frank and tell you the whole truth." "Tell me, doctor, whatever it is." "It is difficult." "Tell me the truth, doctor. How long do I have to live? A year?" "Less." "Less? Well, better I should know. Six months, then?" "Less." "Okay, okay. I can take it. one month?" "I am sorry to have to say it but..." "It is okay, doctor, I accept." So saying he left the room. The doctor was very much impressed at the way the man had taken the news, and he went to the window to take a last look at him. He was standing on the pavement about to cross the…

Osho, I am eager to take sannyas, yet I have been hesitating for a year. I also have this doubt in my mind: what will happen by taking sannyas?

You are still living. Breath still moves. The heart still beats. The blood still runs. However many days may have been wasted, much is still left. The as-yet-unarrived is still there; the future remains. Live this future in a new way, Krishnaraj! Will you keep beating the same old track? Just as you think, “What will happen by taking sannyas?” now think this: what will happen by not taking sannyas? Until now you have not been a sannyasin. What has happened so far? One thing is certain: at least sannyas will be a new experiment. Whether anything happens or not, a new path will be cut. Who knows—what didn’t happen on the old path may happen on the new! Walk with at least that much curiosity. Who knows! The old path is familiar; will you keep circling on it? And not think even once that after so many rounds nothing…

Question: First question: Osho, I want to take sannyas; when should I take it? When there is readiness, understanding happens in an instant. You don’t have to work it out; it is seen, it is a direct seeing. He saw the truth of it: “He’s right. I have spread a net of words for nothing; I know nothing, I have no experience. I argued, I defeated the pundit, but neither he knows nor do I. Tomorrow someone else may come and defeat me. My life has no foundation. I am entangled in verbiage; I have wasted so much time.” Like lightning in the dark, everything was illuminated—clear in a single flash. Not that he went through a chain of reasoning—no. In one instant it was all seen. He placed his head at the master’s feet and said, “You ask, ‘When?’ The moment to do it is now.

Osho, how do I take sannyas? I keep thinking and then I stop. What is this hesitation?

One night a thief broke into Mulla Nasruddin’s house. While the thief gathered things, Mulla quickly spread his blanket on the floor. When the thief, ready to tie up the loot, looked for a sheet to wrap it in, he found a blanket laid out. He was a bit scared—when he had entered, there had been no blanket on the floor. He’d seen a man sleeping under it; now that man lay on the bed without the blanket, and the blanket was on the floor! But it wasn’t the time to ponder. He tied his bundle and set off. Mulla got up and followed. Hearing footsteps, the thief turned and saw the same man who had been on the bed—first under the blanket, then without it. The thief got nervous and said, “Why are you following me?” Mulla said, “Why not follow? I was the only one left back there!…

Once you say 'One should not feel angry at one's master' then what will you do with that anger? And it is there! Just by saying that one should not feel it, it is not going to disappear. You cannot do any magic -- it is still there. You can do only one thing by thinking that one should not be angry at one's master, that this is not right, this is ugly -- you can do only one thing: you can put it by the side where you don't look at it or you can throw it in the basement. So when the well is dug deeper, again you will have to come across it. Or if you hide it so permanently that you never come across it, then something of your being will remain undeveloped, discarded, disowned.