What causes the feeling of restlessness when away from a spiritual teacher?

Beloved Osho, the first time I saw you was when I took sannyas, and I had that beautiful feeling of "being at home" for the first time in my life. Whenever I'm away from you I feel a certain restlessness that keeps me moving from one place to another, never feeling right wherever I am. The moment I'm staying close to you again the feeling is back: I'm home again. 2 what is this beautiful feeling? You always say there is no home unless we find it in ourselves. But what is this feeling of being at home?

There is no home, unless we find it in ourselves. But if you are close to a person who has found the home and you are open to the person, available, receptive, then you will also share the feeling that you are at home. After all, your master's home is your home too. So what has been happening is perfectly right. You go far away; you miss the feeling of being at home and you feel that something is not right. It is perfectly as it should be. But it is only the beginning of a journey. You feel at home when you are close to me. Let this feeling grow deeper; don't let it be superficial. Allow it to sink to your very being; then wherever you are, I will be with you. Right now you have to be with me to make it possible for me to be…

Beloved Osho, in all the years with you I felt meditations simply `happened' to me. Then in the last time when I was away from you I felt this was not me, but your grace overflowing towards me. For the first time I saw that I needed to give meditation a priority in my life or it would not happen. Now, melting in your presence again, everything I could ever desire is here. Osho, what happens to the disciple when one is without the master?

There are only two possibilities when the disciple is not with the master. One is that he goes back to the zero where he had been before he met the master. The second is, seeing that if without the master things that were happening in his presence are not happening, it simply means that his presence has not become an intrinsic part of your being. The master need not be outside you. In fact, he is always inside you, and if you can remember it -- "The master is inside me".... And the master is not asking much, just a small place, a small bedroom with an attached bathroom. Once you start feeling yourself as carrying the master within yourself, everything that was happening in the presence of the master not only continues but grows a thousandfold. Because it was the master outside, there was a distance. Now there is…

Beloved Osho, I feel warm love in your presence and now I realize that when I am not close to you it does not happen in the same way. Is it still true that time and space do not make any difference in the great affair between master and disciple?

People's understanding was absolutely wrong that Ananda, who had burst into tears, must have loved the master more. Asked, he said, "I am crying because he was alive, and for forty-two years I have been his most intimate disciple -- intimate in the sense that I was always with him. In these forty-two years not even for a single day was I separate; even in the night I used to sleep in his room, just to be present in case he needed something. I am not crying because I was the most intimate, I am crying because even with such a long physical intimacy I have remained separate from him. Something has remained like a barrier." Gautam Buddha was not dead yet. He had closed his eyes, and he was relaxing into the eternal. He came back, opened his eyes, and said to Ananda, "Don't be worried. It was my…

Beloved master, this is the very first time in my life I have the feeling of being "at home." my heart is strongly beating and I feel a deep gratitude. Why, beloved master, do I lose this feeling of being at home when I am not physically with you, or even when you stop talking?

He said to Maulingaputta, "The same is going to happen to you. If you really want a discussion, don't accept the condition, have the discussion today. We have never been entertained by Gautam Buddha in all these years; it will be a great joy." But Maulingaputta had agreed. And he could understand the point that unless you are utterly silent you cannot absorb the presence, the grace, the beauty of the master. He sat by his side for two years, and after two years when Buddha said, "Now two years are over. You can start your discussion," he said, "Mahakashyapa was right. I have nothing to say, everything has dropped. Just allow me first to touch the feet of Mahakashyapa and then I will touch your feet. He had provoked me and I had felt humiliated by his laughter. I have to ask his forgiveness." He went to Mahakashyapa and…

Beloved Osho, now that I am slowly, slowly turning inward, I find this longing mixed with sadness welling up frequently. It seems connected with the feelings that arise when I see you or dream about you. Is it the realization that I really don't know much love and bliss in my life, or is it the longing for home? Would you please speak to me about this?

But the man said, "I have a question: After taking seven rounds around you, is the journey finished? Is the pilgrimage over?" He said, "No, whenever you have money again, you can come. This pilgrimage is never going to end. And if you don't find me here, you will find somebody else. You can do this pilgrimage around anybody -- you just have to be sensitive to see the real, the living god within. It is not only within me, it is within you also. If you are alert, you can take seven rounds around yourself -- no need to waste the money and no need to go anywhere. Remember, there is no home. Or, the home is everywhere -- both are true." I will not say to you that the home is everywhere -- although it is true. I will say there is no home. If you can continue…