Dhyan Darshan #5
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Read in Original Hindi (मूल हिन्दी)
Questions in this Discourse
A friend has asked: with meditation practice the body gets tired—should one continue the practice or not? Another friend has asked something similar: in meditation the hands move a lot and the hands begin to ache—should one continue the practice or not?
Many of you will also feel that some part of the body gets tired. It is natural. When any limb moves so much, when it gets so much exercise, it will get tired. But only for two, four, six days. Just as with any new exercise you feel fatigue; the same here. In two or four days it will be fine. And when it settles, for the first time you will realize that the limb which was moving during this period was ailing. But until it becomes healthy, you cannot even know it. Like a man who has had a headache since childhood, a pain twenty-four hours a day—he will think that the pain is his head. Only when the pain drops will he know that the pain was not the head.
The limb that is moving more is proof that it is afflicted by some tension. It is not moving without cause. That tension is trying to leave that limb. In that effort the limb will get tired. Let it get tired; don’t worry about it. In two or four days it will be fine. The fatigue will go, and that limb will become healthy.
Whatever impulses in the mind we suppress have parallel, associated parts in the body. In our body and mind everything is parallel. Whatever happens in the mind happens in the body; whatever happens in the body echoes up to the mind. Therefore every impulse of the mind has a corresponding part in the body. And the vibration of that part, its movement, its motion, is a catharsis of some impulse of the mind. Do not stop it. In two, four, eight days its fatigue will go of its own accord.
And when the fatigue goes, then for the first time you will understand that some limb of yours, ill since always, has become healthy. Even if the whole body gets tired, do not be afraid. In two, four, eight days that too settles. And when it settles, you will discover an altogether new meaning of bodily health.
The limb that is moving more is proof that it is afflicted by some tension. It is not moving without cause. That tension is trying to leave that limb. In that effort the limb will get tired. Let it get tired; don’t worry about it. In two or four days it will be fine. The fatigue will go, and that limb will become healthy.
Whatever impulses in the mind we suppress have parallel, associated parts in the body. In our body and mind everything is parallel. Whatever happens in the mind happens in the body; whatever happens in the body echoes up to the mind. Therefore every impulse of the mind has a corresponding part in the body. And the vibration of that part, its movement, its motion, is a catharsis of some impulse of the mind. Do not stop it. In two, four, eight days its fatigue will go of its own accord.
And when the fatigue goes, then for the first time you will understand that some limb of yours, ill since always, has become healthy. Even if the whole body gets tired, do not be afraid. In two, four, eight days that too settles. And when it settles, you will discover an altogether new meaning of bodily health.
Another friend has asked: If a seeker takes sannyas, will it help him in meditation?
Sannyas is a resolve. A resolve that my search will not be for the world but for truth. A resolve that I will not stop at matter, I will reach the divine. Certainly, when such a profound resolve accompanies meditation, the movement becomes very fast. It will increase. And there is a law of the mind: the direction from which the mind withdraws its resolve is the very direction that fades away; and the direction in which the mind makes a resolve is the only direction that remains.
Your house is on fire. You are running down the road. People meet you, greet you; people are passing on the street. You see nothing. That road is wiped out. The next day someone may say, “I greeted you yesterday, you didn’t reply!” You will say, “I have no idea I even met you. My house was on fire, and my mind was not on the road.” The road vanished. Because all your resolve—“the house is on fire”—had run that way. The road is not there, or almost not there. For you, it is not there at all.
Wherever the mind makes a resolve, a new journey of the world begins; the whole existence of the world becomes new. What you set out to seek on this earth becomes your truth. Everything else turns pale and slowly slips to the periphery, to the circumference. It no longer relates to the center of life.
Sannyas is a resolve. A resolve that on this earth, in this very life, I must know that which is not visible, the invisible; I must know that which is the source of life; I must know that which never dies. The moment this resolve is declared deep within your mind, your meditation gains ten millionfold speed. It is all a matter of resolve. The world we have, which we call our world… We are so many sitting here, but we are not all sitting in one and the same world. We are all sitting in different worlds. Each person’s resolve is his world.
A poet walks out at night; for him the moon and the stars are everything. A thief also goes out at night; he has no notion of moon and stars. In his world, the moon and stars have not risen. He will see locks, houses, safes, policemen, barking dogs—but not the moon and stars. The moon and stars are not part of his world; they lie outside his resolve.
Our world is selective: from this vast world we choose only what our resolve desires. That is why we all live in different worlds. We appear to be in one world; in truth, we live in very different worlds. And even a single person does not live his whole life in the same world—one person changes thousands of worlds within one lifetime.
When you were a small child, you were in another world. If you had gone to the riverbank and found a hundred-rupee note lying there, you would have ignored it; you would have brought back conch shells, colorful stones. That hundred-rupee note was not in your world. Those colorful stones, a shell with no price at all—you would have picked them up like diamonds. Your world was different. Grown-ups would have laughed and said, “What a fool you are! Throw that away and pick up the hundred-rupee note!” But the grown-ups do not know that the hundred-rupee note is not part of a child’s world.
Today if you go to the riverbank, the shells and conches will not even appear to you; the hundred-rupee note will instantly seize your mind. The river will fade, the sand will fade, the shells will fade; the hundred-rupee note will become everything. Today your world is different. It is a world of notes, not a world of shells, colors, and stones.
We change our world moment to moment. Sannyas is a resolve to seek, not the visible world, but the invisible world that is different from this visible one. With that decision, with that determination, everything changes. And the depth of meditation becomes infinitely multiplied.
Nor do I believe that one who takes sannyas should run off to the forest. It is the world that must change, not the place. It is the consciousness that must change; a change of circumstances accomplishes nothing. Circumstances change instantly at the very moment the consciousness changes. As soon as the mind changes, the outer world becomes different.
A sannyasin enters another world while remaining in this one. Even when sitting in his shop, the sannyasin’s consciousness no longer remains in the shop. And a shopkeeper may sit in a temple and yet not arrive in the temple; he keeps sitting in his shop. So the question is not of changing circumstances, it is of changing the state of mind. And the state of mind changes instantly with resolve. One decision—and everything is transformed.
So I do not say that taking sannyas means running away somewhere. To take sannyas means that, right in the midst of this world, you immediately open the door to another world. With that decision, the pace of meditation is certainly going to increase; meditation can reach samadhi.
Let me say a few small things regarding meditation. Then we will sit for the experiment.
Today is the third day; the movement should go further. If each morning’s sun finds us where yesterday’s evening left us, then in the meantime we have not been alive. To be alive means only one thing: that we have moved ahead. If the sun that set yesterday evening left you at a point, and this morning’s rising sun finds you at the same point, the night was wasted. If this morning’s rising sun, at evening’s setting, still finds you in the same place, the day has been wasted. And not a single moment of time can be returned.
Since we have come here at all, surely some longing for meditation is moving in some corner of the mind, some thirst for the search for the divine, little or much, slipping about somewhere inside. Since we have come, it is necessary that we work in that direction with our whole strength. Today is the third day, so let us all hope that we will engage ourselves with more intensity, more strength, and more resolve. Other than your resolve, nothing else is decisive. Your resolve itself is your sadhana. And in the measure of your resolve, the result is made available immediately; no power in the world can stop it. And if the result is not available, know only one thing: your resolve fell short. You did not put in your total strength.
So, during meditation, watch whether you are putting your whole being into it or not. Do not save even a little. One who saves even a little will not be able to drown. The situation is almost like this: a man wants to sink deep in the river, and yet with one hand he clings to the bank—just with one hand—his whole body in the water, just one hand holding a root of the tree on the bank; and he says, “I am completely in the water, I am only holding on a little with one hand; what obstacle can this little bit create? Ninety-nine percent of me is in the water, only one percent is held outside—what obstacle can that be? I should drown.” He will not drown. That one percent that is outside will become the very cause of his being held back. No—he will have to let go. He will have to let go totally. The instant he lets go totally, drowning happens. And without drowning, no one can attain. A total involvement is required. If even an inch of you remains outside, it becomes useless. Meditation means to drown completely.
So let us try again today. Yesterday some seventy percent of friends went very deep. Today I hope we will go even further. Those who went as deep as they did will go further still. Those who were left behind will exert more. In these five days, it would be sad, unfortunate, if anyone who has come here were to leave without some experience. At least one ray of experience must break forth. And for one who receives a single ray, the journey to the sun becomes possible—because by following the ray, one can reach the sun. That very path is formed. At least one ray must break forth in your life. So, for your part, please take care to see whether you are putting in your whole strength or not.
In the first ten minutes, breathe intensely; put your whole power into the breath. Put in so much that nothing remains besides the breath. Forget that anything else exists. Let only breath remain. Let it feel as if you have become nothing but a breathing mechanism. You are no longer there; only breath remains.
Then, in the second stage, let there remain only whatever happens: dancing, jumping, crying, shouting—lose yourself completely.
Then, in the third stage, let only the question remain: Who am I?
And in the fourth stage, let even that not remain. In the fourth stage, dissolve completely; nothing remains to be done. In that fourth stage, the happening begins.
Now let us stand for the experiment. Spread out a little, at some distance from one another. Those who have come merely to watch, please step outside; stand at the back. Go behind, outside the compound wall. No onlooker should remain inside. And no onlooker should stand on three sides—only in front, before me—everyone else please go behind the people.
Be mindful: stand a little apart so that when someone dances or jumps—and today a great momentum will come—there is some space. It is the third day; therefore the speed is going to become threefold.
So I take it you are standing. Those friends who feel they will need more room, who feel like jumping more, may step a little outside. If someone bumps into you, don’t be concerned; take care of your own process. Keep jumping.
Close your eyes. Those who have come to watch, please do not talk; stand silently and watch from a distance; do not come inside. Close your eyes. Fold both hands and, with head bowed, make a resolve before the divine: Keeping the Lord as my witness, I resolve to put my whole strength into meditation. Keeping the Lord as my witness, I resolve to put my whole strength into meditation. Keeping the Lord as my witness, I resolve to put my whole strength into meditation. Total! Remember, total! Do not hold back even a little—one hundred percent!
Begin the first stage. For ten minutes let there be only breath. Only breath. Lose yourself; let only breath remain.
Only breath. Very good! Only breath. Disappear; let only breath remain. Let the body sway, let it jump. Energy will awaken; the body will tremble and dance. Leave the worry. Care only for the breath. For ten minutes like the bellows of a blacksmith. If sound arises, let it arise… only breath… only breath… faster… faster… faster… strike… strike hard with the breath, so that the kundalini can awaken. It will awaken—with the blow it will awaken. The body will fill with electricity; like an electrical instrument it will start shaking and swaying. Let it shake and sway; keep taking only breath.
Very good! Move further… move further… put in your whole strength. Make sure nothing inside you is being held back. Let it come… energy is awakening; let it awaken… strike… keep your eyes closed and strike… keep your eyes closed and keep striking. Do not open your eyes for forty minutes. Keep your eyes closed and strike… seven minutes remain, strike deep… let only breath remain, and let everything else disappear… breath… breath… attend—let only breath remain… let only breath remain…
Very good! See that no one is standing idly. Do not try to look here and there. Whoever wishes to look should go outside.
Very good! Very good! Keep moving. A few friends have fallen behind; move ahead. In ten minutes, everyone must reach the right place. Make sure—aren’t you lagging? Let the body sway… let it dance… if sound arises, let it arise… let there be only breath. Very good! Very good! Further… further… do not hold back even a little; let go totally…
Six minutes remain—move… move… faster… faster… faster… let every pore tremble… let every limb of the body shake… energy will awaken, the whole body will sway. Five minutes remain—half the time remains. Apply your strength… apply your strength… Very good! Very good! Let no one be left behind. Remember your resolve; put in your full power. Energy is awakening… inside you will feel the energy rising… energy will begin to move upward within. Strike strongly and let the energy rise. Strongly… strongly… four minutes remain… strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly… do not hold back—strongly… strongly… strongly…
Very good! Three minutes… strongly… just a short time left—three minutes… put in your whole power… Before we enter the second stage, the total energy should be awakened. Every pore should be filled with power. Fill with energy… it will awaken from within; it will also enter from without—let only energy remain, only pulsation… breath… breath… strongly… strongly… strongly…
Two minutes… When I say—one, two, three—then breathe absolutely like a madman.
One! Put in your whole strength. Two! Put in your whole strength. Three! Put in your whole strength. Very good! It’s a matter of one minute—put in your whole strength… come to your climax, your total power… Very good! A few seconds… apply your full power… then we will enter the second stage. Leap… jump… if sound comes, let it come… deliver the final blow with the breath…
Very good! Now enter the second stage. Let the body do whatever it wants to do. If it wants to dance, then intensely; if it wants to shout, shout intensely; if it wants to laugh, laugh intensely; if it wants to cry, cry intensely. Whatever is happening in the body, do it intensely. Leap… jump… dance… cry… shout… We have to empty the mind. Whatever is happening, do it intensely. Turn the mind inside out. In ten minutes, the mind will become completely empty. Energy has awakened; pour it out. Pour it out—pour it out intensely—whatever is happening, do it intensely… not softly, not slowly—intensely… shout… dance… jump… cry… laugh…
Very good! Let no one remain behind. Move forward intensely. Seven minutes remain… put in your whole power… Energy has awakened—bring it out with full force. Very good! Intensely… intensely… become nothing but an electrical instrument. Whatever is happening, let it happen intensely. Dance… jump… shout… laugh… cry…
Six minutes remain—do it intensely… do it intensely… then we will enter the third stage. Empty the mind.
Five minutes remain—empty the mind completely. Shout… shout intensely… So many people are here; five minutes remain—raise a storm… Dance… dance… dance intensely…
Four minutes remain—apply your full power and pour it all out. Whatever is coming out, let it come out. Dance… dance… dance… shout… cry… laugh… intensely… intensely…
Three minutes remain. When I say—one, two, three—become absolutely mad. Throw all your madness out. One! Throw all your madness out. Two! Throw it out… throw it out… hurl it out intensely. Three! Throw it out intensely… pour it out completely… for one minute, apply your total strength… let no one remain behind. More intensely… more intensely… more intensely… Shout… dance… intensely… intensely…
Enough—enter the third stage. Keep dancing, keep swaying, and ask within—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Ask outside on the outside; ask inside on the inside—but with force. Who am I? Who am I? Keep swaying, keep swaying, keep jumping, and ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Put in your whole strength; forget everything; let every fiber of your being ask one question—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?…
Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Dance, sway, jump, ask—Who am I? Who am I? We have to tire the mind completely. Ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? The more you tire, the deeper the relaxation you will enter. Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Seven minutes remain—apply your full power…
Ask, ask—Who am I? Keep swaying, sway in bliss, keep dancing, ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Six minutes remain… Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Five minutes remain… Apply your full strength… then we will go into rest. Ask, ask, ask. Dance, dance, jump. Ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Become absolutely mad… Four minutes remain… Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Apply your full strength… Three minutes remain… Apply your full strength… Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly…
The right moment has come; apply your power strongly. Two minutes remain; when I say—one, two, three—you must apply your total power.
One! Become absolutely mad. Forget everything.
Two! Become absolutely mad.
Three! Apply your whole strength.
Very good! Even more intensely… it is a matter of one minute… then we will rest. Jump, leap, dance, inquire. Do not be left behind; ask intensely. Very good! The last seconds… come to the peak… then we will rest—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?…
Now stop… just stop… drop everything… drop the questioning, drop everything… drop dancing, jumping—drop everything… dissolve as a drop dissolves in the ocean. Drop everything… dissolve as a drop dissolves in the ocean. All is silence, all has become silent. All is peace, all has become peaceful. All is void, all has become void. Lost, erased… as if dead. To be lost in the divine is life. Lost, erased— as if dead. To be lost in the divine is to attain the nectar of immortality. Only light remains. All around, infinite light remains. Fill with light alone. All around there is only light; dissolve in that ocean of light.
Infinite light, infinite, infinite light. All around only light. Sink, become one. Only light, infinite light—everywhere only light. Sink, disappear, savor it, become one with this light. Fountains of bliss are bursting within—bliss and only bliss, bliss and only bliss. Let it fill you; let the waves of bliss fill everywhere. Let the waves of bliss saturate every pore. Inside, a shower of bliss is falling. Within, fountains of bliss are erupting. Within, bliss and only bliss is pouring.
Bliss and only bliss. Light and only light. All around, other than the divine, there is no one at all. Only that is, only that is—remember, remember, recognize. All around, other than the divine, there is nothing at all. In the sky, in the winds, in the rays of the sun, in the earth—everywhere, other than the divine, there is no one at all. Recognize His temple. Recognize His path. All around, other than the divine, there is nothing at all.
Only the divine, only the divine. In the heartbeat, that alone; outside, that alone; inside, that alone. Remember, remember—only the divine is. Then what sorrow? Then what death? Then what tension? Then what restlessness? If the divine is, then there is bliss and only bliss. If the divine is, then there is nectar and only nectar. If the divine is, then there is light and only light.
All around, infinite light, light and only light—such light that thousands of suns grow pale; we are standing in such light. All around, bliss and only bliss—such bliss that oceans prove small; we are drowned in such bliss. Drink it in; let it fill every fiber. Let it fill beat by beat of the heart. Bliss and only bliss, bliss and only bliss, infinite bliss. Light and only light, infinite light. All around, other than the divine, there is nothing at all. Outside also that, inside also that; other than the divine, there is nothing at all. That alone is truth, that alone is life.
Sink, drown completely. Lose yourself, lose yourself completely. As a drop falls into the ocean, so fall—become one with the ocean.
You are no more, erased, ended. Only that remains which was before birth. Only that remains which is after death. Only that remains which always remains. Remember, recognize. What was before birth, what will remain after death—that alone remains now. The wave has disappeared; only the ocean remains. Light and only light, far and far, to infinity—wherever thought can reach—there is only light. Bliss and only bliss—deeper and deeper, as far as understanding goes—there is bliss and only bliss. Flowers of light keep blooming, and the vina of bliss begins to play. Notes of bliss are arising; flowers of light are blossoming.
Now fold both hands; bow your head at His unknown feet. All around are only His feet. All around is only He. Fold both hands, bow your head, and offer thanks. The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! Surrender at His feet. All around are only His feet. The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! Surrender at His feet, place your head at His feet, offer yourself—like one offering flowers of worship, offer yourself. The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless!
Now lower both hands. Open your eyes gently. If the eyes do not open, place both hands over the eyes, then take two or four deep breaths, then sit down in your place.
Let me say two things to you and then we will part. Those who are standing and find it hard to sit down, do not hurry; take two or four deep breaths and sit down slowly. Those who have fallen to the ground, do not hurry either; take two or four deep breaths and rise slowly. Sit in your place. Let me say two things to you, then we will depart. Sit gently. If you cannot sit yet, remain standing for a while; take two or four deep breaths, then sit. If you cannot get up yet, remain lying for a while; take two or four deep breaths, then rise. Take two or four deep breaths, two or four deep breaths, then sit gently. Those who have fallen, also take two or four deep breaths and slowly get up. Take two or four deep breaths, then sit down slowly. Those who have fallen, take two or four deep breaths and rise gently.
Two things. You did the experiment properly, worked hard; many friends went deep. Still, a few friends keep standing with their foolishness—nothing can be done about that. I said so many times: do not stand inside with your eyes open. Yet two or three people inside keep standing with their eyes open. If I look toward them, they quickly close their eyes; if I do not look, they open them again. If children do this, they can be forgiven; but if elders do this, it becomes very difficult. If you want to watch, stand outside and watch—no restriction—but do not stand inside. Here, others are harmed, and you are harmed as well. Stand outside at ease and keep watching.
To those friends who come to watch, I would say: try doing it as well. Because from outside, nothing at all can be seen. You will see people dancing and jumping; what is happening within them, you will have no idea. And what is happening within—that alone is the real thing. If that could be seen, something would be seen; otherwise, nothing has been seen. Some things can be seen from the outside; some things can be seen only from within. Meditation and religion are such things that can be seen only from within; they cannot be seen from the outside.
Look from the outside too—one day, stand outside and watch; another day, stand inside and watch as well. Standing outside, chatting and laughing, let no one think that he is very intelligent. Having watched from outside, do not conclude that these people are mad and I am wise. In truth, considering the other mad is nothing more than a safety measure. It is an attempt to protect oneself.
And in this world, except the mad, no one considers others mad. A madman never thinks himself mad—that is his symptom. Go to the asylums, and the madman does not consider himself mad in the least. If a madman starts to think himself mad, his madness begins to be cured.
It is very easy to consider another mad. People considered Jesus mad; Meera too, Kabir too, Buddha too, Mahavira too. On this earth, whoever has gone in search of the divine has appeared mad to all those who consider the search for wealth and position to be intelligence. Those who consider the search for Delhi to be intelligence—the seeker of liberation appears mad to them. Those who consider the search for safes and strongboxes to be intelligence—the seeker of the temple appears mad to them.
But before you consider someone mad, think about yourself: what are you seeking? How meaningful is what you are seeking? And what you are seeking—many have already attained it; then what did they attain? They depart with empty hands, still empty.
Those friends who have done the experiment in the morning—I would like that in the evening they bring the same intensity into the evening experiment; then the results will be a thousand times deeper. Those who have danced and jumped so much in the morning, in whom so much energy has awakened, should also stand for the evening experiment.
If you have questions, write them and give them to me in the evening; we will talk about them in the evening. Those who have any personal questions may come and meet me any day between two-thirty and three, while the meditation is going on, and talk.
Our morning sitting is complete.
Your house is on fire. You are running down the road. People meet you, greet you; people are passing on the street. You see nothing. That road is wiped out. The next day someone may say, “I greeted you yesterday, you didn’t reply!” You will say, “I have no idea I even met you. My house was on fire, and my mind was not on the road.” The road vanished. Because all your resolve—“the house is on fire”—had run that way. The road is not there, or almost not there. For you, it is not there at all.
Wherever the mind makes a resolve, a new journey of the world begins; the whole existence of the world becomes new. What you set out to seek on this earth becomes your truth. Everything else turns pale and slowly slips to the periphery, to the circumference. It no longer relates to the center of life.
Sannyas is a resolve. A resolve that on this earth, in this very life, I must know that which is not visible, the invisible; I must know that which is the source of life; I must know that which never dies. The moment this resolve is declared deep within your mind, your meditation gains ten millionfold speed. It is all a matter of resolve. The world we have, which we call our world… We are so many sitting here, but we are not all sitting in one and the same world. We are all sitting in different worlds. Each person’s resolve is his world.
A poet walks out at night; for him the moon and the stars are everything. A thief also goes out at night; he has no notion of moon and stars. In his world, the moon and stars have not risen. He will see locks, houses, safes, policemen, barking dogs—but not the moon and stars. The moon and stars are not part of his world; they lie outside his resolve.
Our world is selective: from this vast world we choose only what our resolve desires. That is why we all live in different worlds. We appear to be in one world; in truth, we live in very different worlds. And even a single person does not live his whole life in the same world—one person changes thousands of worlds within one lifetime.
When you were a small child, you were in another world. If you had gone to the riverbank and found a hundred-rupee note lying there, you would have ignored it; you would have brought back conch shells, colorful stones. That hundred-rupee note was not in your world. Those colorful stones, a shell with no price at all—you would have picked them up like diamonds. Your world was different. Grown-ups would have laughed and said, “What a fool you are! Throw that away and pick up the hundred-rupee note!” But the grown-ups do not know that the hundred-rupee note is not part of a child’s world.
Today if you go to the riverbank, the shells and conches will not even appear to you; the hundred-rupee note will instantly seize your mind. The river will fade, the sand will fade, the shells will fade; the hundred-rupee note will become everything. Today your world is different. It is a world of notes, not a world of shells, colors, and stones.
We change our world moment to moment. Sannyas is a resolve to seek, not the visible world, but the invisible world that is different from this visible one. With that decision, with that determination, everything changes. And the depth of meditation becomes infinitely multiplied.
Nor do I believe that one who takes sannyas should run off to the forest. It is the world that must change, not the place. It is the consciousness that must change; a change of circumstances accomplishes nothing. Circumstances change instantly at the very moment the consciousness changes. As soon as the mind changes, the outer world becomes different.
A sannyasin enters another world while remaining in this one. Even when sitting in his shop, the sannyasin’s consciousness no longer remains in the shop. And a shopkeeper may sit in a temple and yet not arrive in the temple; he keeps sitting in his shop. So the question is not of changing circumstances, it is of changing the state of mind. And the state of mind changes instantly with resolve. One decision—and everything is transformed.
So I do not say that taking sannyas means running away somewhere. To take sannyas means that, right in the midst of this world, you immediately open the door to another world. With that decision, the pace of meditation is certainly going to increase; meditation can reach samadhi.
Let me say a few small things regarding meditation. Then we will sit for the experiment.
Today is the third day; the movement should go further. If each morning’s sun finds us where yesterday’s evening left us, then in the meantime we have not been alive. To be alive means only one thing: that we have moved ahead. If the sun that set yesterday evening left you at a point, and this morning’s rising sun finds you at the same point, the night was wasted. If this morning’s rising sun, at evening’s setting, still finds you in the same place, the day has been wasted. And not a single moment of time can be returned.
Since we have come here at all, surely some longing for meditation is moving in some corner of the mind, some thirst for the search for the divine, little or much, slipping about somewhere inside. Since we have come, it is necessary that we work in that direction with our whole strength. Today is the third day, so let us all hope that we will engage ourselves with more intensity, more strength, and more resolve. Other than your resolve, nothing else is decisive. Your resolve itself is your sadhana. And in the measure of your resolve, the result is made available immediately; no power in the world can stop it. And if the result is not available, know only one thing: your resolve fell short. You did not put in your total strength.
So, during meditation, watch whether you are putting your whole being into it or not. Do not save even a little. One who saves even a little will not be able to drown. The situation is almost like this: a man wants to sink deep in the river, and yet with one hand he clings to the bank—just with one hand—his whole body in the water, just one hand holding a root of the tree on the bank; and he says, “I am completely in the water, I am only holding on a little with one hand; what obstacle can this little bit create? Ninety-nine percent of me is in the water, only one percent is held outside—what obstacle can that be? I should drown.” He will not drown. That one percent that is outside will become the very cause of his being held back. No—he will have to let go. He will have to let go totally. The instant he lets go totally, drowning happens. And without drowning, no one can attain. A total involvement is required. If even an inch of you remains outside, it becomes useless. Meditation means to drown completely.
So let us try again today. Yesterday some seventy percent of friends went very deep. Today I hope we will go even further. Those who went as deep as they did will go further still. Those who were left behind will exert more. In these five days, it would be sad, unfortunate, if anyone who has come here were to leave without some experience. At least one ray of experience must break forth. And for one who receives a single ray, the journey to the sun becomes possible—because by following the ray, one can reach the sun. That very path is formed. At least one ray must break forth in your life. So, for your part, please take care to see whether you are putting in your whole strength or not.
In the first ten minutes, breathe intensely; put your whole power into the breath. Put in so much that nothing remains besides the breath. Forget that anything else exists. Let only breath remain. Let it feel as if you have become nothing but a breathing mechanism. You are no longer there; only breath remains.
Then, in the second stage, let there remain only whatever happens: dancing, jumping, crying, shouting—lose yourself completely.
Then, in the third stage, let only the question remain: Who am I?
And in the fourth stage, let even that not remain. In the fourth stage, dissolve completely; nothing remains to be done. In that fourth stage, the happening begins.
Now let us stand for the experiment. Spread out a little, at some distance from one another. Those who have come merely to watch, please step outside; stand at the back. Go behind, outside the compound wall. No onlooker should remain inside. And no onlooker should stand on three sides—only in front, before me—everyone else please go behind the people.
Be mindful: stand a little apart so that when someone dances or jumps—and today a great momentum will come—there is some space. It is the third day; therefore the speed is going to become threefold.
So I take it you are standing. Those friends who feel they will need more room, who feel like jumping more, may step a little outside. If someone bumps into you, don’t be concerned; take care of your own process. Keep jumping.
Close your eyes. Those who have come to watch, please do not talk; stand silently and watch from a distance; do not come inside. Close your eyes. Fold both hands and, with head bowed, make a resolve before the divine: Keeping the Lord as my witness, I resolve to put my whole strength into meditation. Keeping the Lord as my witness, I resolve to put my whole strength into meditation. Keeping the Lord as my witness, I resolve to put my whole strength into meditation. Total! Remember, total! Do not hold back even a little—one hundred percent!
Begin the first stage. For ten minutes let there be only breath. Only breath. Lose yourself; let only breath remain.
Only breath. Very good! Only breath. Disappear; let only breath remain. Let the body sway, let it jump. Energy will awaken; the body will tremble and dance. Leave the worry. Care only for the breath. For ten minutes like the bellows of a blacksmith. If sound arises, let it arise… only breath… only breath… faster… faster… faster… strike… strike hard with the breath, so that the kundalini can awaken. It will awaken—with the blow it will awaken. The body will fill with electricity; like an electrical instrument it will start shaking and swaying. Let it shake and sway; keep taking only breath.
Very good! Move further… move further… put in your whole strength. Make sure nothing inside you is being held back. Let it come… energy is awakening; let it awaken… strike… keep your eyes closed and strike… keep your eyes closed and keep striking. Do not open your eyes for forty minutes. Keep your eyes closed and strike… seven minutes remain, strike deep… let only breath remain, and let everything else disappear… breath… breath… attend—let only breath remain… let only breath remain…
Very good! See that no one is standing idly. Do not try to look here and there. Whoever wishes to look should go outside.
Very good! Very good! Keep moving. A few friends have fallen behind; move ahead. In ten minutes, everyone must reach the right place. Make sure—aren’t you lagging? Let the body sway… let it dance… if sound arises, let it arise… let there be only breath. Very good! Very good! Further… further… do not hold back even a little; let go totally…
Six minutes remain—move… move… faster… faster… faster… let every pore tremble… let every limb of the body shake… energy will awaken, the whole body will sway. Five minutes remain—half the time remains. Apply your strength… apply your strength… Very good! Very good! Let no one be left behind. Remember your resolve; put in your full power. Energy is awakening… inside you will feel the energy rising… energy will begin to move upward within. Strike strongly and let the energy rise. Strongly… strongly… four minutes remain… strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly… do not hold back—strongly… strongly… strongly…
Very good! Three minutes… strongly… just a short time left—three minutes… put in your whole power… Before we enter the second stage, the total energy should be awakened. Every pore should be filled with power. Fill with energy… it will awaken from within; it will also enter from without—let only energy remain, only pulsation… breath… breath… strongly… strongly… strongly…
Two minutes… When I say—one, two, three—then breathe absolutely like a madman.
One! Put in your whole strength. Two! Put in your whole strength. Three! Put in your whole strength. Very good! It’s a matter of one minute—put in your whole strength… come to your climax, your total power… Very good! A few seconds… apply your full power… then we will enter the second stage. Leap… jump… if sound comes, let it come… deliver the final blow with the breath…
Very good! Now enter the second stage. Let the body do whatever it wants to do. If it wants to dance, then intensely; if it wants to shout, shout intensely; if it wants to laugh, laugh intensely; if it wants to cry, cry intensely. Whatever is happening in the body, do it intensely. Leap… jump… dance… cry… shout… We have to empty the mind. Whatever is happening, do it intensely. Turn the mind inside out. In ten minutes, the mind will become completely empty. Energy has awakened; pour it out. Pour it out—pour it out intensely—whatever is happening, do it intensely… not softly, not slowly—intensely… shout… dance… jump… cry… laugh…
Very good! Let no one remain behind. Move forward intensely. Seven minutes remain… put in your whole power… Energy has awakened—bring it out with full force. Very good! Intensely… intensely… become nothing but an electrical instrument. Whatever is happening, let it happen intensely. Dance… jump… shout… laugh… cry…
Six minutes remain—do it intensely… do it intensely… then we will enter the third stage. Empty the mind.
Five minutes remain—empty the mind completely. Shout… shout intensely… So many people are here; five minutes remain—raise a storm… Dance… dance… dance intensely…
Four minutes remain—apply your full power and pour it all out. Whatever is coming out, let it come out. Dance… dance… dance… shout… cry… laugh… intensely… intensely…
Three minutes remain. When I say—one, two, three—become absolutely mad. Throw all your madness out. One! Throw all your madness out. Two! Throw it out… throw it out… hurl it out intensely. Three! Throw it out intensely… pour it out completely… for one minute, apply your total strength… let no one remain behind. More intensely… more intensely… more intensely… Shout… dance… intensely… intensely…
Enough—enter the third stage. Keep dancing, keep swaying, and ask within—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Ask outside on the outside; ask inside on the inside—but with force. Who am I? Who am I? Keep swaying, keep swaying, keep jumping, and ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Put in your whole strength; forget everything; let every fiber of your being ask one question—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?…
Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Dance, sway, jump, ask—Who am I? Who am I? We have to tire the mind completely. Ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? The more you tire, the deeper the relaxation you will enter. Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Seven minutes remain—apply your full power…
Ask, ask—Who am I? Keep swaying, sway in bliss, keep dancing, ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Six minutes remain… Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Five minutes remain… Apply your full strength… then we will go into rest. Ask, ask, ask. Dance, dance, jump. Ask—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Become absolutely mad… Four minutes remain… Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Apply your full strength… Three minutes remain… Apply your full strength… Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?… Strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly… strongly…
The right moment has come; apply your power strongly. Two minutes remain; when I say—one, two, three—you must apply your total power.
One! Become absolutely mad. Forget everything.
Two! Become absolutely mad.
Three! Apply your whole strength.
Very good! Even more intensely… it is a matter of one minute… then we will rest. Jump, leap, dance, inquire. Do not be left behind; ask intensely. Very good! The last seconds… come to the peak… then we will rest—Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?…
Now stop… just stop… drop everything… drop the questioning, drop everything… drop dancing, jumping—drop everything… dissolve as a drop dissolves in the ocean. Drop everything… dissolve as a drop dissolves in the ocean. All is silence, all has become silent. All is peace, all has become peaceful. All is void, all has become void. Lost, erased… as if dead. To be lost in the divine is life. Lost, erased— as if dead. To be lost in the divine is to attain the nectar of immortality. Only light remains. All around, infinite light remains. Fill with light alone. All around there is only light; dissolve in that ocean of light.
Infinite light, infinite, infinite light. All around only light. Sink, become one. Only light, infinite light—everywhere only light. Sink, disappear, savor it, become one with this light. Fountains of bliss are bursting within—bliss and only bliss, bliss and only bliss. Let it fill you; let the waves of bliss fill everywhere. Let the waves of bliss saturate every pore. Inside, a shower of bliss is falling. Within, fountains of bliss are erupting. Within, bliss and only bliss is pouring.
Bliss and only bliss. Light and only light. All around, other than the divine, there is no one at all. Only that is, only that is—remember, remember, recognize. All around, other than the divine, there is nothing at all. In the sky, in the winds, in the rays of the sun, in the earth—everywhere, other than the divine, there is no one at all. Recognize His temple. Recognize His path. All around, other than the divine, there is nothing at all.
Only the divine, only the divine. In the heartbeat, that alone; outside, that alone; inside, that alone. Remember, remember—only the divine is. Then what sorrow? Then what death? Then what tension? Then what restlessness? If the divine is, then there is bliss and only bliss. If the divine is, then there is nectar and only nectar. If the divine is, then there is light and only light.
All around, infinite light, light and only light—such light that thousands of suns grow pale; we are standing in such light. All around, bliss and only bliss—such bliss that oceans prove small; we are drowned in such bliss. Drink it in; let it fill every fiber. Let it fill beat by beat of the heart. Bliss and only bliss, bliss and only bliss, infinite bliss. Light and only light, infinite light. All around, other than the divine, there is nothing at all. Outside also that, inside also that; other than the divine, there is nothing at all. That alone is truth, that alone is life.
Sink, drown completely. Lose yourself, lose yourself completely. As a drop falls into the ocean, so fall—become one with the ocean.
You are no more, erased, ended. Only that remains which was before birth. Only that remains which is after death. Only that remains which always remains. Remember, recognize. What was before birth, what will remain after death—that alone remains now. The wave has disappeared; only the ocean remains. Light and only light, far and far, to infinity—wherever thought can reach—there is only light. Bliss and only bliss—deeper and deeper, as far as understanding goes—there is bliss and only bliss. Flowers of light keep blooming, and the vina of bliss begins to play. Notes of bliss are arising; flowers of light are blossoming.
Now fold both hands; bow your head at His unknown feet. All around are only His feet. All around is only He. Fold both hands, bow your head, and offer thanks. The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! Surrender at His feet. All around are only His feet. The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! Surrender at His feet, place your head at His feet, offer yourself—like one offering flowers of worship, offer yourself. The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless! The Lord’s grace is boundless!
Now lower both hands. Open your eyes gently. If the eyes do not open, place both hands over the eyes, then take two or four deep breaths, then sit down in your place.
Let me say two things to you and then we will part. Those who are standing and find it hard to sit down, do not hurry; take two or four deep breaths and sit down slowly. Those who have fallen to the ground, do not hurry either; take two or four deep breaths and rise slowly. Sit in your place. Let me say two things to you, then we will depart. Sit gently. If you cannot sit yet, remain standing for a while; take two or four deep breaths, then sit. If you cannot get up yet, remain lying for a while; take two or four deep breaths, then rise. Take two or four deep breaths, two or four deep breaths, then sit gently. Those who have fallen, also take two or four deep breaths and slowly get up. Take two or four deep breaths, then sit down slowly. Those who have fallen, take two or four deep breaths and rise gently.
Two things. You did the experiment properly, worked hard; many friends went deep. Still, a few friends keep standing with their foolishness—nothing can be done about that. I said so many times: do not stand inside with your eyes open. Yet two or three people inside keep standing with their eyes open. If I look toward them, they quickly close their eyes; if I do not look, they open them again. If children do this, they can be forgiven; but if elders do this, it becomes very difficult. If you want to watch, stand outside and watch—no restriction—but do not stand inside. Here, others are harmed, and you are harmed as well. Stand outside at ease and keep watching.
To those friends who come to watch, I would say: try doing it as well. Because from outside, nothing at all can be seen. You will see people dancing and jumping; what is happening within them, you will have no idea. And what is happening within—that alone is the real thing. If that could be seen, something would be seen; otherwise, nothing has been seen. Some things can be seen from the outside; some things can be seen only from within. Meditation and religion are such things that can be seen only from within; they cannot be seen from the outside.
Look from the outside too—one day, stand outside and watch; another day, stand inside and watch as well. Standing outside, chatting and laughing, let no one think that he is very intelligent. Having watched from outside, do not conclude that these people are mad and I am wise. In truth, considering the other mad is nothing more than a safety measure. It is an attempt to protect oneself.
And in this world, except the mad, no one considers others mad. A madman never thinks himself mad—that is his symptom. Go to the asylums, and the madman does not consider himself mad in the least. If a madman starts to think himself mad, his madness begins to be cured.
It is very easy to consider another mad. People considered Jesus mad; Meera too, Kabir too, Buddha too, Mahavira too. On this earth, whoever has gone in search of the divine has appeared mad to all those who consider the search for wealth and position to be intelligence. Those who consider the search for Delhi to be intelligence—the seeker of liberation appears mad to them. Those who consider the search for safes and strongboxes to be intelligence—the seeker of the temple appears mad to them.
But before you consider someone mad, think about yourself: what are you seeking? How meaningful is what you are seeking? And what you are seeking—many have already attained it; then what did they attain? They depart with empty hands, still empty.
Those friends who have done the experiment in the morning—I would like that in the evening they bring the same intensity into the evening experiment; then the results will be a thousand times deeper. Those who have danced and jumped so much in the morning, in whom so much energy has awakened, should also stand for the evening experiment.
If you have questions, write them and give them to me in the evening; we will talk about them in the evening. Those who have any personal questions may come and meet me any day between two-thirty and three, while the meditation is going on, and talk.
Our morning sitting is complete.
Osho's Commentary
There are two or three questions; let us understand a few things about them.